Saturday, February 28, 2009

We have selected the Tuxedo’s for the Bridal party

Last weekend Lori and I decided on Tuxedo Junction as our source for the tuxedo’s to be worn at the wedding. After visiting the store and working with the wonderful Mellissa O’Dell we went with traditional tuxedos with an Apple Vest (to match the Bridesmaid’s dresses. I will be in tails as well as my father and Lori’s brother (who will give Lori away). Sometime in March or April we will organize a date when most of the groomsmen can meet us at the store to get fitted, Those who can not make it or live far enough away where this would be inconvenient can be fitted at a store near them and should be sure to get fitted by May 1st.

The Wedding band Saga - Conclusion.

Lori and I got the call for the store and picked up my wedding band. We were happy to find that it fits and even looks nice on my finger. It has been placed in the safety deposit box and awaits its next appearance Oct 24th.

Thursday, February 26, 2009

Happy and Sad at the same time?

Over the last few months Lori and I have had wonderful things happen to us as well as terrible things. For the last few weeks we just keep asking ourselves what could be next… Up or Down? The answer… Both

We found out that Josh a real real good friend of ours (and one of the ushers in our wedding) has been offered and accepted a job in Chicago Illinois. Josh starts his new job in a few weeks and his family will be following him to Chicago over the summer. Not to worry there are no plans to replace Josh in the wedding as he still plans on attending.

Lori and I are extremely excited for Josh, Kath, and Kaelyn. Opportunities like this don’t come all the time and are even harder to come by in this economy. We certainly wish them all the best and want them to know we will always be here for them. We also want them to know that we now have a reason to visit Chicago so if we show up on the door step one day don’t hide behind the furniture and pretend you are not home, please answer the door.

On the other side of the coin (and a little bit selfish) it is always sad when good friends move away. So at the same time we are so happy for them we are very sad. It will make board game nights, camping trips, and time we spend together just little bit further apart.

Let the music play

Well Lori and I have selected Phenomenon Sound in West Seneca to be the DJ and Master of Ceremony for our Wedding Reception. After meeting with Ryan we both left with a great feeling for their services and later that day decided this was the group for us.

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

What is the Recipe?

People are always saying “When life gives you lemons, make lemonade”… Well we have the lemons, we just don’t know the recipe for this batch of lemonade?

A few weeks ago Lori and I had a day we wish we could forget but never will be able to. To use an old cliché… we will always remember where we were when… No this was not a bad relationship day for us (although we do have them occasionally), this was a bad family health day.

On that day Lori and I found out that her mother needs to have surgery for an aneurysm that is growing in her head, behind her ear. We have known about this aneurysm for a while but its location (between two bones) has kept it under control and thus there has been little need for surgery. Well now the aneurysm is expanding and the doctors feel surgery, to put a stint in place and strengthen the artery, is the best option. Although surgery has come a long way it still makes us very nervous. The surgery is scheduled for March 3rd please keeps Lori’s mother in your prayers.

Now that news on its own was disturbing but….On that same day we found out that Lori’s uncle (her mother’s only living sibling) has inoperable stage IV cancer. The doctors have given him 6-12 months to live if he chooses not to have chemotherapy and 12-18 months with. Now we realize that these time frames are just averages but the realization is that short of a miracle his time with us is short. This is an uncle that Lori’s entire family is very close with and some I have come to know very well over the last 8 plus years. We see him just about every holiday, at all family events, and I even get to spend time with him during hunting season at the cabin.

Now I am a firm believer that God only gives people what they can handle. If you include the items above with the wedding planning and some other rather minor issues we are dealing with (ie water leak in the house) I think our gauge is pointing to full. I can’t begin to describe how Lori feels about what I mentioned above. I just know that learning of all of this while she is supposed to be so happy planning a wedding just breaks our hearts.

So I repeat “We have the lemons, what is the recipe? The truth is we could sure use some guidance from above on this one.

Marriage counseling Session 3 – Setting Goals for your marriage

Marriage counseling Session 3 – Setting Goals for your marriage

We reviewed Session 3 –Setting Goals for your marriage. During this session we discussed expectations in many areas or marriage, how setting goals for our marriage can often take stress off the marriage, and it will allow us a way to gauge the success of our marriage. Our homework for today was to individually list our goals and come up with a list of “Fight Rules” and we will discuss each of them as a group at our next meeting.

Marriage Counseling Session Three – Postponed.

This post comes with our deepest sympathies and great sorrow in our hearts.

Today was supposed to be session three of our Marriage counseling with Pastor Roger Farney but Pastor Farney postponed the session to attend his father funeral. Pastor Farney our thoughts are with you and your family as you got through this difficult time.

Sunday, February 22, 2009

Logic clearly dictates that the needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few

Logic clearly dictates that the needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few
- “Captain" Spock Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan (1982).


Eight days before Christmas 2008 a tragic murder-suicide in Alden NY left 2 wonderful children without parents. Those two children ages 13 and 11 will never see Christmas the same way all of their friends do and they may never look forward to that time of year like almost every other child does. These children have been left to face many challenges as they grow up without their mother or father. I would never wish these life challenges on anyone let alone two children.

The story can be found in the Buffalo News: http://www.buffalonews.com/home/story/525362.html

With everything going on today in society (ie stock market down, banks struggling, companies going bankrupt and millions of people losing their jobs) it would have been easy for society to sweep these kids under the rug and just claim there is nothing to give. People could try to justify this claiming “that the needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few” but when Spock spoke those words it was without consideration of the human heart and how deep people will dig to help children in need, regardless of the affect it may have on their situation.

This family mentioned in the article was very close with my good friends Kelly & Tommy Ebeling as well as their two children (Bryanna and Karly). The kids all grew up together, were all in school together (same grades), went to girl scouts together and stayed at each others house. It broke their hearts to see these two children go through such a tragedy and facing an uncertain future. So they decided to step up and do something about it. Kelly & Tommy are in the process of creating a fund that will help provide for these children as they grow up as well as help them with a secondary education. To start this fund they have organized an annual snowmobile run as well as Basket Auction benefit.

The 1st Annual Wilczak Snowmobile Run kicked off today Feb 22nd around 11:00 from Byrncliff Resort & Conference Center in Varysburg, NY and was a resounding success. Each participant was to visit 4 stops on the trail and roll 3 dice at each stop. At the finish there was a dinner, 50/50 raffle, and basket auction. Trophies were awarded to the three participants (male and female) with the highest cumulative dice roll as well as the individuals with the lowest cumulative dice roll. All of the proceeds went to the real winners…The Children. One interesting fact is that most of the snow in western NY had melted but in the past few days, seemingly just in time, the snow started to fall again and there was enough accumulation for the event to go forward.

I volunteered to man one of the stops and write down the dice total for each participant. After all of the participants had visited my stop, I went back to Byrncliff and helped collect the tickets, total the scores, determine the winners, sell basket auction tickets, 50/50 raffle tickets, and tee shirts. My part was small but it sure was uplifting to see person after person come through the door to help these children. Some participated in the Snowmobile run others just came for dinner. Some were employees of Byrncliff working on Sunday, some were friends bringing more items for the auction, and still other were people never meet before with big hearts willing to give. 100-150 people participated in the run at a cost of $25 and\or came to dinner at a cost of $20. Almost to a person each person stepped up and bought 50/50 raffle tickets, then stepped to the basket auction table and bought tickets for the auction, continued on to a second raffle for some large items being raffled (ie snowmobile helmets and snowmobile coats that had been donated), proceeded to the tee-shirt table to buy a tee shirt for the event and then got in line for the buffet dinner.

With things going they way they are in the world today I find it uplifting to watch people of all ages dig a little deeper, potentially give up one of life’s pleasures just to give to those in need. Thanks to these people and many more like them, the fund for the Wilczak Children is off to a great start.

Kelly and Tommy have also organized a much larger Basket Auction benefit to be held March 15th. From the sounds of it this Basket Auction has grown to quiet the event. They have had a local farm donate a pig to the cause and a local butcher has donated the processing of the pig. The pig will be raffled off in two halves fully processed and ready for your freezer. Among other things the auction will also include Autographed Sabres Stick, Autographed Bills Jersey, Autographed CDs including one from Martina McBride, a Pheasant hunt valued at $150, Passes to the Miss Buffalo pageant, Free rounds of Golf, a 6 hour boat charter on Lake Ontario for 6 people and over 200 baskets. Arrangements have been made for a band, polish dancers, and magicians to provide entertainment.

However first and foremost what you will find at this benefit will be the same thing I found today at the snowmobile run… People all with hearts the size of Niagara Falls and all willing to give up a little of what they have, to help someone in need.


Blesses are those who can give without remembering and take without forgetting
- Elizabeth Bebesco


Anyone interested in purchasing some raffle tickets for 1/2 a pig can contact me. The tickets are $2\each or 3 for $5. The 2 winning tickets will be drawn live at the Basket Auction on March 15th (you do not need to be present to win).

The Basket Auction benefit it will be held March 15th at:
Millgrove Volunteer Fire Hall
11621 Genesse St.
Alden, NY 14004

Anyone interested in donating to the cause can send donations to:
Friends of the Wilczak Family
c/o Kelly Foss Ebeling
6489 Broadway
Lancaster, NY 14086

An account in the name of “Friends of the Wilczak Family” has been setup at the Alden State Bank in Alden NY.

Friday, February 20, 2009

Aslan’s Identity crisis

Lori and I have a kitten (6-7 months old) that Lori named Aslan (yes after the lion from The Chronicles of Narnia). Well following Bob Barker’s advice we decided to have Aslan Neutered. Since he was at the vet we also decide to have him declawed (for the sake of the furniture and all of my sweatshirts), and all of his shots brought up to date. Well Aslan came home today after a night at the Vet. The poor guy has stitches (in place we can not mention on this blog), and surgical glue on both of his front paws. He has been shaved bald in numerous places and to top it all of has a cone around his head to prevent him from grooming any of the afore mentioned spots while he heels.

When he first got home we were a bit worried he would hate us for everything but I think he was just happy to be home. For 2-3 days he just followed Lori around the house not letting her get more than a few feet from him. After that he started to want his own space again. The good news is that it appears he is still the same loveable Aslan as the one we took to the vet. In a couple of weeks Aslan will be back to fighting with me through the banister, chasing balled up paper or yarn, and wrestling with his special mousey on a string.

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

The wedding band saga continues

The jeweler called today and informed us that they were sorry but my wedding band would not be in until March. I told them no worries as long as it is in by then. Truth is we have till Oct but they don’t need to know that. :)

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Marriage Counseling Session Two

My Wedding band still has not arrived. The jeweler has agreed to check in on it and give us an update tomorrow. Thanks heaven we did this on Lori’s time line and not mine as we still have lots of time for it to arrive. If we had waited for my normal schedule the wedding would be just a few days away and we would be stressing about being one Wedding band short of a wedding.

Today we had our second meeting with Pastor Farney. We started today discussing Lori’s and mine history of Christianity and our definition of being born again. We both are Christians but at the moment neither of us are born again in the biblical sense.

We also reviewed session #2 – The Unique Aspects of Marriage Partnership. We discussed those things that make up a good partnership concentrating on the “One Anothers” list (seen below). A list of verses that will build a strong relationship when followed by both partners.

1. Love one another (John 15:12)
2. Don't pass judgement on one another (Rom. 5:8)
3. Be members of one another (Rom. 12:5)
4. Be devoted to one another (Rom. 12:10)
5. Honor one another (Rom. 12:10)
6. Live in harmony with one another (Rom. 12:16)
7. Build up one another (Rom. 14:19)
8. Be like minded toward on another (Rom. 15:5)
9. Accept one another (Rom. 15:7)
10 Care for one another (1 Cor. 12:25)
11 Serve one another in love (Gal. 5:13)
12 Don't spitefully hurt one another (Gal. 5:15)
13 Don't provoke envy in one another (Gal. 5:26)
14 Bear one another's burdens (Gal. 6:2)
15 Be kind to one another (Eph. 4:32)
16 Forgive one another (Eph. 4:32)
17 Submit to one another (Eph. 5:21)
18 Don't lie to one another (Col. 3:9)
19 Bear With One Another (Col. 3:13)
20 Abound in love toward one another (1 Thes. 3:12)
21 Comfort one another (1 Thes. 4:18)
22 Don't hate one another (Tit. 3:3)
23 Encourage One Another (Heb. 3:13)
24 Stir up one another to live and good deeds (Heb. 10:24)
25 Don't slander one another (Jms. 4:11)
26 Don't bear grudges against one another (Jms. 5:9)
27 Confess your sins to one another (James 5:16)
28 Pray for one another (James 5:16)
29 Greet one another (1 Pet. 5:14)
30 Have fellowship with one another (1 jn. 1:7)

Saturday, February 7, 2009

Our Bridal Party is set

Well it is now official, everyone we asked to be in our wedding party has agreed. I can’t tell you how excited Lori and I are to have everyone on board. This is going to be one fun wedding. To go along with our Best man and Maid of Honor we have 7 Groomsmen, 7 Bridesmaids and 2 Junior Brides maids.

Best Man: Mark
Maid of Honor: Cathy (Lori’s Sister)

Groomsmen:
Joe
Josh
Lyle (my brother)
Doug (my brother in law)
Jimmy (Lori’s brother)
Brian
Billy

Bridesmaids:
Barbara,
Julie
Susie
LeAnne (my Sister)
Leigha (Lori’s Great niece)
Dee, Lisa (Lori’s niece)

Jr Bridesmaids:
Jenny (my neice)
Bryanna